Newmarket's Glenway Residents Want Their Green Space Back

Bathurst St location

Rooters: Special; TPE News: Newmarket, Ontario, Canada

Tea Brewhaha Party President, Tomassino Paezzano, has taken up billboards across the province of Ontario to push his new green platform called "Green Back". Paezzano's plan apparently involves having towns sell off all their available property to "environmentally friendly developers" which would be determined by an appointed board to be formed at a future time.

Told this particular property was the last remaining undeveloped green space in town and that the " Green" movement actually was for preserving and not developing green space Paezzano responded,

" What? Are you frickin serious? Where I come from green means money, and I'm sure I'm not alone on dat. Right guys?"...." Guys? Where the frick is everyone?"(crickets chirping)

In other related local news, embattled Newmarket Councillor Maddie Du Muccio, embroiled in an ongoing dispute with Mayor Tony Van Bynen, has asked the mayor for an apology following an incident in which she claims the mayor was disrespectful. The mayor has thus far refused and when asked for a comment he was allegedly heard to mutter, 

" I don't smoke crack"

Town council meeting

Asked to clarify, Mayor Van Bynen stated he was merely saying that at least he didn't smoke crack - referring to the well publicized Toronto Mayors video - and that he had been speaking quietly to someone else, privately. 


Pushed again for comment on Ms. Dumuccio's allegations, the former bank teller turned manager turned mayor replied,

Alleged obscene gesture

" I have too much respect for my daughters, mother, aunts, friends' daughters, sisters, grand-mothers, hostel women, single moms, women women, you name it, to answer that question. Now if you'll excuse me I have a car dealership opening to attend."

At press time, a motion to hire a mediator at an estimated cost of $30,000 dollars was being considered.

TPE News